Archive | January 2014

GFFR: Chēbē Bread

Around here, I’m not the only gluten-free guy. I’m also not the only diagnosed Celiac on the planet. I’m sure people know people and then know people, but I got to tell you, I’m the only guy I know around here that has his own website and is the greatest Gluten-Free blogger in the world. I’m also they guy that get’s asked about what GF food is good and what’s not, and if you know me, I don’t hold back. I give 100% honest food reviews. That’s what I do here with my Gluten-Free Food Reviews (GFFR).

Sometimes I get people telling me that I HAVE to try this product or that product and usually I do. My sister Katrina is no different, since she has gone Gluten-Free she is trying all kinds of food now and passing the ideas to try on to me. Well, she was all about this Chēbē Bread pizza dough product.

Here, let her tell you. So here is Katrina:


Sitting at home with a bronchial infection I couldn’t think of what I wanted to eat.

I walk to the pantry and I notice the box of Chēbē pizza crust sitting there waiting for me to make & eat.

The unmade product wasn’t very appealing. It just looked like a bag of baking soda.

I went to the kitchen & I grabbed all the ingredients. They crazy thing is, it asks for a cup of shredded cheese in the crust….how amazing is that?

So as I preparing the dough my mouth is watering. The smell of onion & dough fill my nose. Oh gosh. Delicious.

So I did the kneading, flipping & thinning out on the ungreased pan.

Now, I used what is in the house for toppings, which isn’t much.

I spread garlic on the crust then pasta sauce.

I put green olives & pineapple as the toppings. Sweet & salty. Then I added the cheese. I debated it, but I put in a little bit.

I was very impatient while it baked. I get that from my father. I even took it out when the timer was at 15 mins. I put it back in for 3 more mins. 18 in total.

I pulled the sweet looking pizza pie out of the oven and instantly drooled.

I poured a glass of water. Grabbed some sweet Thai chili sauce to dip my pizza in and went right to my living room to devour it.

My first bite. Was amazing. I didn’t know whether I should cry with excitement or just smile and keep eating… I kept eating.

So my end result of Chēbē pizza crust is a 10/10. I’m in love.

Now, I need to find out where it is sold. I picked up this box at Homesense and they don’t usually get repeats on stock.

So Chēbē send me over more of your product. I need to get my fingers and mouth on it.

Aaaaaand scene.


I’m back. But I gotta tell you this. Katrina was texting me to try this pizza dough, so I did. She ended up giving me half the pizza, and after the first bite I was hooked. Katrina didn’t steer me wrong. I was driving while I was eating and each piece was gone by the time I left the road she lives on. I have NEVER had a pizza crust that tastes so close to the regular pizza you see all the other non-diagnosed Celiacs eating.

You have to get Chēbē Bread and you have to eat the shit out of it.


Celiac and the Heart Disease

You know what’s up this past January. Snow snow and more snow. Polar vortexes. Well, lets just say that anything you can throw at us Mother Nature, she did. It’s been a busy month, what with me being an outdoor snow guy and living in Canada. I’ve been hopping.


During one of the insane amounts of snow fall I found myself shovelling the white gold off of one of my customer’s driveways and then it hit me…chest pain. Oh shit I thought to myself. Am I going to die right here? Am I having a heart attack? Am I going to be that guy? Like any true blooded winter warrior, I pressed on. I ain’t got time to die. I have to shovel this snow.


Now wait a second. Does the fact that I have Celiac Disease make me more or less susceptible to a heart attack or even heart disease? Seems like a fair question.

What you need to note is that I am in no way a medical professional and I’m just a blogger. The greatest Gluten-Free blogger on the planet, but still, a dude with no medical background. Yes I had my first aid certificate, but that lapsed in July 2012. So what could I possibly know about the connection between Celiac and heart disease? Well, nothing.

By reading the internet and a few magazine articles I can string together enough information to bring to you to. I’ll give you the jumping point for you (the person who stumbled across this blog searching through Google) to start you research.

I have to tell you, this is the dumbest thing to look up. There is always two conflicting schools of thought. Which inevitably leads to an answerless question. Every where I looked no one really seemed to have an answer. It was all experts this and that, but a definite answer was no where. What a bummer. I read a whole two page interview with a medical guy that went no where. All he said was, was that if you are a diagnosed Celiac and have Diabetes you are at risk. O_O

Yes our diet is different. Yes as Celiac we tend to ingest more sugar in our Gluten-Free diet than most of the population (that’s really only through commercial products) but when you get down to the heart of the matter (ha ha I said heart), heart disease can be genetic. So you can’t do anything about it. Heart disease can be affected by diet, lack of physical and power eating brownies.

C’mon universe, you can’t just have Celiac sufferers just also be afflicted with super muscles?

3I took three pictures for today’s blog, and even though I don’t need three, I’m putting this one in dammit.I mean look, it’s flying snow, that’s good timing.

GFFR: Glutino Cereal

When I do a Gluten-Free Food Review (if that’s what you’re wondering what the GFFR acrynom stands for in the title of this blog) I always try to do one for the little guy. I’m never paid to do them or swayed by any one company to make sure that that said review is favourable. But, every so often I come across a food made by the nationwide companies that is really good or surprising, and I just have to tell everyone.

We’ve all heard of Glutino. A company steeped in out brains that they are gluten-free, hell, their name is GLUTINO how could you not forget about them. A company that is right there at every grocery store in the gluten-free aisle. A company that pretty much creates a GF alternate to every food. The first company I was introduced to when I was first diagnosed.

Now, some of their food is hit and miss. Some of it isn’t for me, and some I would tell you to go to the store and buy and stock up, but the other day I was at Mom’s (who is also a diagnosed Celiac) and she had no food in the fridge for me to eat. As a Son, I reserve the right to just go an eat whatever leftover food my Mom has (in the past, Mom has had to write ‘do not eat’ on her food because I will get at it. I’m an awesome Son). But nothing. So I resorted to looking in the cupboard. Cereal. I had to eat cereal.


Lo and behold, Glutino has a cereal I’ve never heard of. The name a lone baffles me to my core: Frosted Sensible Beginnings. WHAT! But at the same time, what an awesome name. I get it though. It’s the GF alternative to Frosted Flakes and I haven’t had Frosted Flakes in years, so I was all over that.

First thoughts. It smelled like stale paint. Like when you open a can of paint after ten years and its all hard useless. That was what it smelled like. Instantly I was turned off and wasn’t about to eat it. Then my change of heart happened and I was like, this is a good entry for the website. So I powered through. What did I find? Gluten-Free food has a habit of being harder and has a stale texture to it sometimes, and while this cereal was just like that the taste was great. Amazing. Mind blowing. The subtlety of the frosting was great and mixed well with the milk. It pleased me.

While it wasn’t Frosted Flakes, it was good.

I’m heading to Mom’s right now. Guess what I’m going to have a bowl of?

Good job Glutino.

Celiac vs. Food Dye (an apology)

You hear a lot of us Celiacateers complaining that our little disease doesn’t get a lot of recognition. We strive just to get our name just right for the masses; Silly-ac or Seal-e-ac. Then the joe that asks ‘what’s gluten?’

Yeah, that’s our thing.

Imagine my surprise when I openly mocked someone with a sensitivity. Not in public, but to my wife. I’m not perfect, I just flat out ridiculed these people for having something that seemed so silly. At first I saw the sensitivity on CeliacHashiGirl’s Facebook Page and shook my head, like, what? I even looked it up because I had never heard of it.

Food Colouring Sensitivity. Or Food Dye.

I remember when I was younger and I had heard all about the Red Dye 9 stuff, but when I was younger I had no real clue about what it meant or was really about. Of course when I say young I mean teens, early teens. That’s mid-90’s, when I was to busy watching Scream and The Edge. But to the degree that food dye sensitivities are at now, I had no clue.

The_Edgemovie_wallpaper_pictures_photo_pics_poster260310092953the_edge_movie_2This is The Edge. This movie is awesome.

After my brutal private mocking, it hit me. That’s the same issue that we diagnosed Celiacs have. Trying to inform the public about our hidden disease. Something that most people this is all in our heads or just made up to gain attention. I see the error of my ways. I see that what I did for the Food Dye Sensitive group, I cornered you and bullied you. I made a huge mistake. I didn’t go out and post about how fake it sounds, I did it at home and in private, but I might as well of done it publicly.

I found a good website that informed me and helped me to understand the struggles of this little thought about deal. If you’re as clueless as I am about food colouring and the effects it could/does have, I recommend you check them out.

I don’t want you to think I am some insensitive prick just going about  my daily routine as a bully of diseases. I’m not, I was just ignorant to the struggles of the people who suffer from this. Adults and children a like. I can sympathize with those included in that group. Having to avoid foods they really want, Hell, I write about it almost weekly with my Celiac Woes posts.

Not being able to have certain foods isn’t what a food colouring sensitivity is all about. I know that now, and I got your back. So if anyone has an issue with you, send them my way. I’ll set them straight.

I’m only human, and just because something is different or seems insignificant, it does not deserve to be treated poorly. I did that with those affected by food colouring, and I won’t make that mistake again.

Here’s a Doritos Video

A week or so ago I wrote a Celiac Woe about Cool Ranch Doritos not being Gluten-Free and how I was sad about that and blah blah blah. What I failed to attach to that blog post was a really great video that I found on the internet produced, direct, wrote and edited all independently by a guy named Rob Morgan.

Since I forgot to include it, and I liked it so much, I wanted to give it it’s own little post here. So please watch the video and support the little guy.

He also has a bunch of other fun videos on his channel so I also encourage you to watch and enjoy them as well.

Celiac Pros: President’s Choice

The list of cons, or woes, when it comes to Celiac is long and winded. Not just me, but every singe diagnosed Celiac can tell you a million stories about the cons associated with this pain in the ass disease. But every now and then we get a win. That’s what I call a CELIAC PRO.

My Mother-in-law has been making a bad ass chili this winter and I gotta tell you, it’s awesome. I’ve now added it to the list of amazing homemade gluten-free food that I love. This list includes: my wife’s GF lasagna, my mom’s GF Canadian schnitzel and now my mother-in-laws GF chili. The last time my wife picked up all the ingredients and her Mom made the food. Cooked it all day, simmered it, let it set and after a long ten hours of snow plowing that day I inhaled bowl after bowl of this GF jewel.


Now, its a new week and a new chili, and mom-in-law has purchased the ingredients. The only problem is, she wasn’t sure what was a gluten-free sauce or not. Even the canned tomatoes she was unsure of. You’d think that tomatoes canned would be okay, but I was concerned about the spices that were canned right there with them. You know the deal about spices.

I made the call. I took it upon myself to call the company and find out if the sauce and tomatoes were gluten-free. It’s a simple task, and a smart one to make when you need to know whats happening with the food you eat. Wether it’s gluten-free or not. Sometimes we get the run around, sometimes we get a straight answer and then sometimes we get an answer we don’t want to hear.

Here is where the Celiac Pro comes in. Here is the kudos to a company that has it’s shit together; President’s Choice. I called to ask about the sauce for the chili, and they asked for the barcode. How interesting is that? I’ve never heard of that, but guess what, it’s amazing way to track how and where their food is made. Like if a line has been used in conjunction with wheat or allergens or whatever. Or if it was processed in an independent plant. Ingenious.

It was awesome to find out that the food I was enquiring about was in fact gluten-free, just by simply checking a barcode.

A great Celiac Pro from a company that seems to be on the ball. Good job President’s Choice. You’re really doing all us Celiacateers a solid. Hitting a home run for the 1% of us diagnosed.

I’ve Always Had Celiac Disease

I really should have known I had Celiac Disease. All of the signs were there. But really, who the hell had heard about it? I reached a pinnacle of being sick during the mid-90’s, mostly coupled with upset stomach and anxiety that had me removing myself from situation in public. Today I though, hey, lets get to know Jordan and revisit some of the times when I should have known I had Celiac Disease.

When I was diagnosed back in 2008 I was sick for six weeks straight. Terrible poops and nausea, losing weight, gaining weight. I was tired all the time. It was just a not a good time for me. The doctor didn’t really know what was going on. Nothing inside my gut had exploded, no internal organs were enlarged and it didn’t hurt when he poked at me. Even the prostate exam at 28 years showed nothing. Yup, poked and prodded. Then there was the Pepto Bismal to help with the poos and the anti-nausea medication, but nothing was working. The final blood test and subsequent endoscopy showed what was the underlying problem, and the eventual bane of my existence: Celiac Disease. And that is the story of my diagnosis.

All my life I was the shit machine. After dinner, before dinner. Lunch, morning. Six times a day was normal for me. I rarely crap in public toilets, so after school during the 90’s was heaven for my bowels. Using the washroom in the mornings before school caused me to miss the bus more times than I could count (thanks so much to my Gramma who would drive me to school more times than I could count).

One thing thats funny… in the early 2000’s my wife made mention of a person she knew that had Celiac and couldn’t eat bread and wheat and junk. At the time I was like ‘oh yeah?’ then never mentioned it again. Funny how that happens. I think I questioned her about it a few years after that and she couldn’t remember the name of what he had. And I was only a few years away from being diagnosed with it myself.

All the signs were there when I was a teenager. All the signs were there when I was an adult. The crapping was a major indication, but if I had only added in the anxiety the piece would have fell into place.

There was a incident where I was going through all kinds of stomach issues, and I always described it as I feel like I have to shit and throw up at the same time, though when I went to the can, I never did both. I just sat there in both agony and embarrassment. Finally relief came on the afternoon of my Grandparents 40th wedding anniversary, vomit. Vomit like a boss. Even now, probably 14 years later, I still remember that feeling of relief when I threw up.

The signs were always there, just no one really knew the issue. No one addressed my eating habits. No one looked at gluten like a poison. I guess looking back, while the signs were there for a person with Celiac, no one had the cover of the puzzle box to get every piece to where it needs to be. That’s why it wasn’t until 2008 when I was diagnosed.

Oh man, this was not a funny post at all. Okay, I will give you a story that has to do with poo, and one of the reasons I will never leave a during a movie while its playing at a theatre.


1997. The movie Masterminds was out in theatres, and it had Patrick Stewart in it. Of course I’m going to go see it. Well, the whole time this movie is going on, I’m waiting for him to use something from Star Trek, or reference it in some way. Like a giddy fanboy I just want him to say that monumental line and then cheer. Well, as luck would have it, I had to go to the washroom right in the middle of the movie, and I did, and I missed it. He said it. Patrick Stewart made his reference and I missed it.

You kidding me?

That was the last time it ever happened.

You see, Celiac Disease affected me so much I had to make a chose for it to never control me (even before I was diagnosed with it, so lets call it my stomach issues), my stomach issues be damned, I would never leave a theatre in the middle of a movie again, because you miss cool shit.

Looking back, I’ve always had Celiac Disease.

%d bloggers like this: